Best Coffee One Liners / Quotes

1st May 2017

  1. A day without coffee is like... Just kidding. I have no idea.
  2. Coffee. Because adulting is hard.
  3. I love it when the coffee kicks in and I realize what an adorable badass I'm going to be today.
  4. I like big cups and I cannot lie
  5. Coffee helps me maintain my "never killed anyone" streak.
  6. Ways to win my heart: 1. Buy me coffee 2. Make me coffee 3. Be coffee
  7. All things are possible with coffee and mascara
  8. Today's good mood is sponsored by coffee
  9. Coffee makes everything okayer
  10. May your coffee be to strong and your Monday be short.
  11. I wouldn't do anything for a Klondike Bar, but I'd do some pretty sketchy stuff for some coffee.
  12. A coffee a day keeps the grumpy away.
  13. Sometimes I go hours without drinking coffee. It's called sleeping.
  14. My blood type is coffee
  15. Life happens. Coffee helps.
  16. I drink coffee because without it, I'm basicallya 2 year old whose blankie is in the washer
  17. Coffeeology: Espresso yourself. Stay grounded. Better latte than never. Take life one cup at a time. Take time to smell the coffee.
  18. Depresso: That feeling you get when you've run out of coffee.
  19. When life gives you lemons, trade them for coffee.
  20. My birth stone is a coffee bean.
  21. Decaf coffee? Would you like some orange free orange juice with that?
  22. Of course size matters. Nobody wants a small cup of coffee.
  23. My coffee addiction has gotten so serious that I'm calling for an intervention. Let's meet at the coffee house around 2.
  24. The difference between your opinion and coffee is that I asked for coffee.
  25. I think my patience is at the bottom of this coffee cup. Hand on while I find it.
  26. All men should make coffee for their women. It says it right in the Bible... "Hebrew".
  27. I don't have a problem with caffeine. I have a problem without it.
  28. Sorry, you lost me at "I don't drink coffee"
  29. It's strange how drinking 8 cups of water seems impossible but 8 cups of coffee go down like a chubby kid on a see-saw
  30. Water is the most essential element of life, because without water you can't make coffee.
  31. Lord, give me coffee to change the things I can, and wine to accept the things I can't
  32. I find your lack of caffeine offensive
  33. Not to get technical, but according to chemistry, coffee is a solution.
  34. Wanna hear a joke? Decaf.
  35. Coffee. The most important meal of the day.
  36. I'm a coffeeholic on the road to recovery... Just kidding! I'm on the road to the coffee shop!
  37. Not all who wander are lost. They're just looking for coffee.
  38. If you can't remember my name, just say "coffee" and I'll turn around
  39. Coffee: Because crack is bad for you.
  40. Everything I brew, I brew it for you.
  41. Evolution of a coffee drinker: 1.) 4 parts creamer, 1 part coffee 2.) Half creamer, half coffee 3.) Black coffee 4.) Black coffee with espresso 5.) Snorting coffee grounds
  42. Coffee - because hating your job should be done with enthusiasm.
  43. As it turns out, 93% of my personality was just coffee.
  44. I workout - I lift my coffee to my mouth every day!
  45. Coffee. My hot friend I was telling you about.
  46. Coffee. Because prison orange is not my color. 
  47. A poem for mornings: Coffee, coffee, coffee, coffee. Coffee, coffee, everyone shut up. Coffee